The popularity of the Kpopalypse 2024 Objectification Survey post-Waterbomb Festival has been substantial, with many people rushing to put in votes for their favourite male and female idols! This extra traffic to Kpopalypse.com won’t do, it’ll just inflate my already massive ego, so that means it’s time to tone down the popularity of this site a little and bring back the k-pop series that nobody actually reads. Yes that’s right it’s time for another episode of the longest-running nugu series in k-pop, it’s Kpopalypse Nugu Alert!
Because I’m really disliking being popular right now, this particular episode of Kpopalypse Nugu Alert is all about trot groups. There’s nothing that will turn off today’s hip, trendy young people faster than the ‘old person music’ that is trot, and that’s fair enough too because it’s mostly pretty generic shit. However it can’t be denied that if you can get past the restaurant-tier instrument and arrangement choices, there are also occasional bangers in this style. Will there be any in this episode? Let’s find out!
Usual Kpopalypse Nugu Alert rules apply:
- Less than
20,00010,000 views across official channels, let’s keep it nugu in more than name only unlike everywhere else on the English-speaking Internet that uses the word - Probably not the subject of your peers’ Wattpad k-pop fanfictions
- Relevant to Kpopalypse
Let’s take a look!
Troika – Love Score
First nugus for this episode are boy-trio Troika and I’ll be damned if their trot song isn’t actually pretty good. They also have some cool matching outfits, and do a reasonable job of dancing in the school classroom where it’s always 10:10am for some reason. I guess time might stand still for you too when you’re looking at trot boys with crooked teeth and overdone lip-tracing. I also have to tip my hat to the person who was asked to write some dance graffiti for the outdoor purple-barrel set, they definitely took their job very literally, just don’t ask what’s in the barrels. Anyway I enjoyed it and here’s a bonus video from a music show and it’s pretty impressive that a group this unknown actually got on a high-profile music show, maybe they’re doing better than their YouTube viewcount would indicate?
YouTube views at the time of writing: 6650
Notable attribute: most out-of-sync lipsync in the entire Nugu Alert series to date at 2:59
Nugu Alert Rating: high
N-Day – One Two Three
Adult-oriented k-pop group N-Day (not sure what the “n-word” being abbreviated in this case is) have a pretty cool trot-pop song here which is nearly identical to the early T-ara style. This isn’t their normal thing though and N-Day usually sound a bit more modern, as you can see here in this “snack” of a dance video:
And also this other song which veers in the tropical house direction and has a dance video that’s actually letterboxed inside of a letterbox, so despite me having a large monitor to write this post on the damn video is still the size of a fucking postage stamp:
So as you can hear “One Two Three” is definitely their best song by far, as well as the only one with anything approaching a proper video, but who knows if that means the girls will stick to this musical direction. I hope they do because the song is cool, even if it’s a little bit ruined by the comical part at the end where they play hand-drums along to the beat and leave it in the mix instead of just miming it or something. Also, what is it lately with trot groups and wearing denim? Maybe a future Kpopalypse Fashion Class needs to investigate this trend.
YouTube views at the time of writing: 3286
Notable attribute: the vinyl record on top of the couch at 0:29 is the soundtrack to a Cheech & Chong movie – dating scandal with Skull incoming?
Nugu Alert Rating: very high
Ruviche – Minsoo’s Delivery
You might look at that thumbnail and expect some kind of hip-hop with guys posing with motorcycles or something, but this is a trot Nugu Alert so of course appearances are deceptive here. Ruviche are a girl group and their song is about as old-school as the fast-paced dance-pop end of trot gets, and they’re also occupying a familiar nugu set, the “place with fluro tubes of different colours, mesh fences and lots of signs”. Not only that but they have that other nugu standby – a non-working clock. Someone should shell out some money for a bunch of batteries and send them to these groups. Anyway, since we’re doing bonus videos in this episode, why not check out this (very empty looking) live stage so you can see all the motorcycle-revving choreography in context, you know you want to.
YouTube views at the time of writing: 807
Notable attribute: bizarre section at 1:15 where the girls all ride toddler tricycles for some reason dilutes the “cool motorcycle girl” factor elsewhere
Nugu Alert Rating: extreme
Wang Geon – It’s Money
Keeping with the old-school trot theme here, and Wang Geon’s song is just a little too traditional to be any good. I have to respect him busting out the dance moves though, from his careful “I’m pretty sure this is how those NewJeans kids do it but damn my back hurts” arm-waving, I can tell that he’s likely even older than Kpopalypse. I’m also digging the “walking along like we’re really going somewhere very important” which gives me fond memories of Girls’ Generation doing the same cheesy bullcrap years ago. There’s not too many signs of the money he’s referring to though, we’re long past the days when flying a drone above your dance routine was in any way expensive, I suspect he blew the entire video budget on that devastatingly colour-clashing suit. Oh and I dug up a live version for you to enjoy on some TV show, so you can see the moves without the editing, enjoy!
YouTube views at the time of writing: 362
Notable attribute: nipple bulging through his shirt at 0:51, I guess it was a cold day, or maybe he’s just trying extra hard to get onto the Objectification Survey this year
Nugu Alert Rating: off the chart
That’s all for this episode of Kpopalypse Nugu Alert – the series will return!
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